28 Dec 10 Basketball Commentator Power Rankings 2010

Ethan Miller/Getty ImagesWith the recent announcement of NBA awards, I have been thinking about player rankings. There are so many metrics! Were all familiar with the stats per game metrics, assist to turnover ratio, +/-. These metrics are simple- there are plenty more complicated stats like PER, true shooting percentage, usage rate, value added, etc. These metrics aren always clear, but they give us a variety of ways to try and quantify a player value to a team. My dream job is to be a basketball color commentator, so IReebok Green Bay Packers #52 Clay Matthews Realtree camo Jersey
set out to rank commentators in my first Commentator Power Rankings column. How will I evaluate commentators in a fair and balanced way? I propose a new metric with which we can judge a commentators value to a broadcast:Commentator Efficiency Rating:[ (interesting insights) x (catch phrases) ] annoying factor + number of made up words used + former player?For non math-majors, things on the top of the fraction make a commentator better, the higher the stuff on the bottom, the lower the CER will be. Now let get down to business- here is my commentator power rankings for 2010:473. Steven A. Smith I think this one is self-explanatory. But to be fair, there is nothing that we can learn from the sideline of a basketball game that the crew at half-court couldn tell us. Ric does ok, but, is it just me or is it possible Ric is a robot? And his orange hue is shocking Tan much?28. Mike TiricoStick to the Masters MikeNot horrible, but too friendly for my taste, Mike Tirico comes in at 28 this year. Seems to have a low basketball IQ. You know what youre getting with Mike- a solid but uninteresting broadcast.27. Jalen Rose Does pretty well for a former player, but Im not impressed. Hampered by inconsistent dress choice and one of the worst broadcasting voices, Jalen analysis on ESPN is standard at best. Better choices among former players include Reggie Miller, Gary Payton, and Brent Barry.26. Cheryl Miller Cheryl is my favorite sideline reporter if only because she is taller than many of the players she interviews. You better be nice toReebok New England Patriots #12 Tom Brady Realtree camo Jersey
Cheryl, shell kick your ass if you aren.25. Jon Barry The worst baller of the Barry clan, Jon adds little to the ESPN halftime shows. He lacks personality and is nowhere near as funny as brother Brent. To compound these shortcomings, he lacks the basketball clout to make up for his uninspired television performances.24. Stu Scott Stuart Scott CER just keeps on falling. A stalwart of the 90s, Stu has become a one-trick pony. His overuse of one-word, staccato, declarative street phrases has gotten stale. This is national television Stu, not The Best of Rucker Park on the WB.23. Magic Johnson Great player, poor broadcaster. He makes no effort to try and hide his pro-Laker bias. His interviews with big-time players are lame. I might even prefer Jon Barry to Magic. Look for his CER to fall next year.22. Doug Collins Where to start? Doug Collins talks too much. Way too much. He has a severe case of diarrhea of the mouth. He will talk for minuets without stopping if you let him; the play-by-play guy has a hard time getting a word in edgewise. Doug is my least favorite color commentator. I hope he accepts a coaching job so we don have to listen to him anymore.21. Kenny Anderson Kenny Pictures is not a great segment. Rarely, if ever, does Kenny say anything noteworthy or particularly revealing. I like the banter he shares with Charles, but that alone was not enough to move Kenny any higher than 21.20. Mike Fratello The Czar is nothing special as a color commentator. Like the distinctive voice, but not sure about his analysis at times. Somewhat obnoxious. Actually, straight up obnoxious. Don have anything horrible to say about The Czar, but nothing great to say either.19. Tim Legler Tim does a solid job as a basketball commentator on SportsCenter. His opinions are well grounded, and he is not obnoxious. Could lose the 90s flip hairstyle though; I keep expecting to see him with frosted tips.18. Avery Reebok Indianapolis Colts 18 Peyton Manning Realtree camo Jersey
Johnson Avery has one of the most distinctive voices in all of television. I like this enthusiasm and passion for the game. Have to wonder why this guy doesn have a coaching job yet. If I had a team, preferably one in Seattle, and I couldn hire Jeff Van Gundy, Id hire Avery. My confidence in his coaching abilities didn help his CER though.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ghbtjykb-0feature=player_embedded17. Mark Jackson Mark Jackson struggles as a color commentator are even more visible when he works with Kevin Collabro. Mike Breen and Jeff Van Gundy seem to bring out the best in Mark, whose strongest commentary comes in the form of arguments with former coach Jeff. He overuses his catchphrase Momma there goes that man, which I don find particularly strong to begin with. I know he is a former player, but I think Mark could do better. I wonder if Momma is pleased her son is ranked 17th16. Chris Webber Chris Webber is a bit of an enigma. Funny at times, but not so articulate on basketball analysis, he is someone whose reputation as a player has become greater because of his broadcast career. When I see him on TV, and he says something funny or smart, I think to myself, Yeah. Chris was a great player, he knows what he talking about. Looking back at Chris stats though, we can see that he had a great career but was not an all-time great. His strong on-air personality makes us forget about his attitude problems that got him traded from Golden State to the Bullets after his Rookie of the Year season. Has potential to be a really solid broadcaster- not sure he is sharp (or interesting) enough to become the next Barkley.15. Austin Carr Austin Carr, or Mr. Cavalier as his friends call him, is the local TV color commentator for the Cavs.